A Tale of Two Hentai's
by Kanna37
Summary: Number 17 in the Hentai series - Sesshoumaru shows up, and Kagura gets very happy. On top of that, looks like Naraku's gonna get his life's wish, and Inuyasha and Kagome finally take a food break...


**A Tale of Two Hentais**

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Inuyasha in this reality. However, there does exist an A/U - A/R where I own anything I want...

---xXx---

Sesshoumaru stared into the distance, caught a bit off-guard by the scent of his little brother's pack. What were they doing this far out?

And then his eyes bled just a bit red as he caught the scent of Naraku, as well... perhaps his brothers pack was fighting the spider hanyou?

"Jaken."

The little toad scrambled forward obediently, bowing and scraping as he came. "H-hai, Lord Sesshoumaru?" he squawked.

"Take Rin and find a safe camp for the evening." He turned and looked at his gami servant for a moment, then looked back towards the horizon and began to move away.

As the little toad began to stutter out a response, he paused, and spoke right over Jaken's whiny voice. "If she comes to any harm, Jaken," he trailed off ominously, and was satisfied by the squeak of fear and the gulp from his retainer.

The next instant he was gone, and Jaken breathed a sigh of relief as Rin came running over to ask where their Lord had gone.

As Sesshoumaru moved closer to the area his brother's pack was in, he frowned, beginning to be confused. He could scent the spider, the dead miko, Kagura and Kanna, as well as the monk and the taijiya, and his brother and the younger miko.

But there were discrepancies.

For one, the dead miko no longer smelled dead.

And for another, there was no scent of battle. The only really strong scent was...

His eyes widened, and he wrinkled his nose in disgust.

His brother was busy, it seemed... but with who? The living miko, or the formerly dead one? And he wasn't the only one - the taijiya and the monk were _also_ busy.

Had the world gone mad while he wasn't looking? What in the hell was his brother doing getting laid while the spider hanyou and his entourage sat around his camp with the kitsune and neko?

He stayed back in the trees watching for a few minutes, hiding his aura and scent, and his eyes finally locked on the group sitting off to the side - the once dead miko, the kaze, and the void child.

_That answers the question of who my brother is nailing, I suppose..._

Finally deciding that he wasn't going to find anything out just standing there, he let his youki roll over the area and stepped from under the trees, striding into the camp as though he owned it.

The reactions from those sitting within were _not _what he'd expected, however, and he wondered once again if the world had gone crazy around him.

Naraku was the first to take note of the Inu Lord, and standing, he warily watched him walk into the camp, then with a half-bow, said, "Lord Sesshoumaru. What do we owe this visit to?"

The moment Kagura realized who it was, she jumped to her feet, and grinning like a madwoman, cheerfully waved to Kikyou and Kanna. "See ya laters, ladies - I'm gonna go get me a great big helping of daiyoukai. Have fun!"

Shippo groaned and looked over at Kirara. "You know what? I just hope she takes him very far away so we don't have to hear," he flinched at another loud howl from the woods, "_that _kind of thing."

Sesshoumaru's brow rose as he studied the spider and then the other brow joined it when he heard Kagura's statement, then the kitsune's... and then the howl from under the trees, and he shook his head in disgusted amazement.

"Explain."

That was all he said, but everyone in camp knew what he meant, and Kagura at that point stepped forward with a smile and took his arm, beginning to lead him off into the woods, talking all the while, as Naraku just watched, his mouth hanging open.

He wasn't really surprised at Kagura's actions, after all, he knew she'd had a thing for Sesshoumaru for a long time - no, it was the fact that the daiyoukai was _letting_ himself be lead off.

What no one was aware of, though, was that hearing his brother going for it in the woods, (and at least he was now aware of which female his brother had chosen, he was pleased to see it was the younger miko), had gotten his own mind stuck into hentai mode.

After all, whatever the reasons behind the seeming end of hostilities between the spider and his brother, the plain fact was that they weren't fighting, and with the close proximity of such a delectable full youkai female, i.e. Kagura, he decided to have fun first, and ask questions later.

And for sure... Kagura wasn't about to complain as she cast a triumphant look back at Kikyou.

Kikyou's only concern now?

She was the only adult left in camp besides Naraku, and the way he was eyeing her...

_I need some more chocolate, _was all she could think.

---xXx---

Several hours later, an obviously bedraggled Inuyasha and Kagome stumbled out of the woods, and Naraku let a huge grin sweep across his face at the sight.

"So... finally wore her out, huh, Inuyasha?" he asked.

Kagome looked at him incredulously. "Hell no - but he noticed Sesshoumaru's scent a while ago, and he decided we should probably get up and come see what he wanted." She looked around, then, and noted Kagura's absence, and an almost obscene grin settled on her face.

She turned and looked up at her mate, punching him in the arm. "See? Kagura's gone. Told ya I was right. We didn't have to come back after all!"

Inuyasha's eyes lit up, and he grabbed her arm to drag her back into the trees, but Kagome shook her head. "Not yet, Inu - since we're already here," her brow rose at his pout, "we may as well eat."

He perked up a bit at that. "Ramen?" he asked hopefully.

She looked thoughtful for a moment, tapping one dainty finger against her chin as she weighed their choices. She'd really prefer something heavier, but... then again, ramen didn't take too long, and then they could get back to more pleasant occupations.

She nodded. "Okay. Ramen it is."

It didn't take long to get the dinner going, and just as she was preparing to serve, Miroku and Sango wandered out of the trees. One glance is all it took, and _everyone _knew what they'd been up to... Miroku's rapturous smile gave it away - along with Sango's smug one.

The entire group, however, stared in awe as the _other _couple sauntered out from under the trees - both Kagura and Sesshoumaru more rumpled than anyone had ever seen - Kagura sporting a very large bite mark on the side of her throat, and the biggest grin anyone had ever seen on her.

Sesshoumaru himself seemed very pleased, still straightening and tucking his clothes as they approached, and Inuyasha finally fell over on his side, laughing so hard he was crying.

"Never thought," he gasped between bouts of laughter, "I'd ever see the day," he panted, "that fluffy bastard would look anything less than perfect!" He looked up at his brother, noting the glint in his eye, and laughed some more. "I knew you were a hentai, but..." he broke off, laughing too hard to talk coherently any longer as the rest of the group stared between Kagura, Sesshoumaru, and the laughing hyena on the ground.

Kagome finally reached over and smacked the hell out of her mate, then smiled at the new couple. "So, Kagura... I see you got what you wanted," she winked. "Why don't you sit down and get comfortable?"

Kagura glanced at Sesshoumaru, who nodded, and sat next to her. After a moment, he looked over at his once more calm brother, and said, "This one is surprised to find that you finally had the balls to mark your mate, brother. I had honestly expected you to screw that up."

Inuyasha snorted. "Feh. You would. But you don't know me all that well, bastard. I ain't that stupid - what male can't figure out what to do with his kami-given equipment?"

"Hn."

Miroku looked up from his food at that point and nodded earnestly. "Indeed, Lord Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha was most helpful in introducing me to the hentai ways... and most knowledgeable."

Naraku agreed. "Yes..." he glanced at Kikyou again, a mad hentai light in his eyes, "he certainly got my attention with his advice."

Inuyasha preened under the praise of the two, and Kagome shook her head with a sigh. She turned and looked at Kikyou with a grin. "So... looks like almost everyone else is settled - guess it's your turn, isn't it?"

Kikyou's eyes widened in panicked dismay as Naraku grinned widely and nodded eagerly, standing, he moved over to her, and pulled her up before dragging her off into the forest, calling back over his shoulder, "Thanks, everyone! Don't wait up for us!"

Kagome giggled as Kikyou shot her a dirty look over her shoulder, then looked up and caught Sesshoumaru's expression of disbelief. "What?"

"The spider and the priestess?" he asked, curiosity rampant in his voice.

She shrugged. "Sure. After all, that's what this whole mess with Naraku was all about, you know. Naraku wanted Kikyou all those years ago - but Inuyasha was in the way, and it ended up being a huge mess."

He looked at his brother. "I had assumed you were after the dead miko yourself, Inuyasha."

"Oh, I was at one time," he waved a casual hand, "but things changed when Kagome showed up. And this way, we all get someone, so it's all good."

With a cocked brow, Sesshoumaru thought about it, flicking a quick look at his own new mate. "Indeed, little brother. I see your point." Kagura blushed, and Kagome and Sango chortled.

Shippo, who had taken his ramen, and then sat as far away from the rest as possible, shuddered, and with a wince, tried to fold his ears flat against his head.

As if the conversation around the fire weren't bad enough...

There were new noises coming from the trees, and these were even creepier than the others.

After all, what kind of noises does a spider make when its...

His poor little child's mind shut down at that point, refusing to go any further with that thought.

"Can I go deaf for a while, or something?"he whimpered, and Kirara mewed sympathetically.

---xXx---

A/N: Well, sorry it took so long to write another chapter of this, but it just wasn't cooperating. I couldn't get any good ideas at all, and I'd rather just not write something than try to force it and come out with something horrible.

Hopefully, this entertains a few people - I'm not sure I really like the way it turned out, but... can't like everything all the time, I guess.

Ja Ne!

Amber


End file.
